We thought the best way to tackle this subject was to hear from three guests (as well as Lisa & me) about our own experiences with deciding who to tell, when to tell, why we would be open about it, and some cautionary tales of experiences that didn't go so well.
We're making progress on overcoming the stigma of addiction and alcoholism, but it is still a grossly misunderstood disease, and so it is important to think carefully before sharing that you're sober - even with close friends and family members. Anything that can trigger shame, guilt or people pleasing in early sobriety can be dangerous, and finding a sober community that can help you through decisions like this one is extremely helpful.
As always, we direct you to the tab above with online and offline recovery resources you can access to ask questions, get information, and find a community who TOTALLY understands how you feel.
Addiction lives in the dark; it wants us alone with our own insecurity and guilt. A sober community helps you crack through the shame, guilt and isolation and find your way down the path of sobriety.
So please listen to the stories these women share of their own experiences; we are five different women at different ages and stages of life, with different stories about our drinking history, but as we so often find out, our feelings are the same.
Thanks for listening:
Listen to internet radio with The Bubble Hour on Blog Talk Radio
I just finished listening to this show - engaging, interesting, and encouraging! I think that "to tell or not to tell" is applicable for any and every major lifestyle change where the former lifestyle is considered (by others) to be "not so bad - everyone does it." In that respect, I've gotten many of the same reactions as you mention on your podcast, from people in my own past. And I've noticed (as one of you mentioned) that those who have a hard time with it tend to gravitate away - and the relationship is never the same (or it ends.)
ReplyDeleteWhat I have learned in recovery, though, is that the acceptance and love I've gotten from being in community with others who have made that lifestyle change (or who recognize the need to) has far outweighed the sting of being abandoned or disowned by people who never ever really "got" me, or who only hung around me because I was dysfunctional in the ways that they were dysfunctional. When I changed and they didn't, it was a threat to them - and they didn't like that at all. So they left.
It hurt - but after I experienced the hurt, felt the feelings and released them, I discovered that my quality of life was so much better without these folks bringing me down and keeping me in the slough of despair, the mind-set that "that's just the way I am." I could let it go and be the me I was instead of what they wanted me to be. That's worth a LOT.
Brava, ladies. You are doing wonderful things by just being yourselves in recovery and talking about that. :D